Steps

I just bought a pair of Toms shoes and I am very excited to know that a child will also be getting a free pair of shoes who really needs them. I know that much of the money I spent will also go towards advertising and payroll, but at least a child without shoes now has a pair. As long as I am helping someone, I am happy. It will be nice because whenever I wear those shoes I will think of a child who is just a little bit better off than they were before.

No matter what, I think that charities are great things. As long as most of their money is actually going towards their cause and they are trying to make a change in the world. With some organizations, I wonder if their organization has really done anything to help the people they claim to be supporting. For example, there are some cancer charities that still have not found a cure yet for the cancer they try to combat. You would think that after a few years there might be some progress made.

As for right now, though, I am glad that people are taking a stand and fighting poverty. It is good to see people come together for a good cause.

Create New

More and more I realize how much I miss art and my art classes from high school. That is one of the very few things I miss about that time period. Art class was certainly my way of escaping into my mind, in a place that no one else could come to. In my art I was able to create and recognize who I was and what was going through my mind. Artwork in general is so expressive and each piece has it's own unique story to compliment it.

If I could just work on art for the rest of my life, I would. For now, I will simply work on art as much as I can, and continue to do photography.

if you see it, just close those blue eyes like you mean it

Tomorrow is the last day of classes, and then we have finals and then fin to junior year of college. Golly, that was quick! I am still in awe that college has been skipping past me like a child on the playground. It is just a fleeting sight, quick to leave. I am constantly bombarded with the fact that I will be leaving familiarity soon, and though I can adapt well, I am still nervous about this upcoming change.

On another note, Aaron and I have taken on a new hobby of reading together! This is really exciting for me because I love books and writing and everything to do with paper and words. One of my professors told me that her and her husband would read to one another and it strengthened their relationship a lot. When you read to someone or they read to you, it builds a sense of trust because you begin trusting them for a positive outcome to the story. You trust their words and they enjoy you listening and visa versa. We are reading The Priest's Graveyard by Ted Dekker and it is a Christian thriller, and Dekker is one of my favorite authors. I got the book from my parents and Aaron and I had been looking for a book to read together, so we chose this one. We are thinking that our next book will be a little bit more happy however.

I wish the weather would warm up. It is getting rather dreary outside and I wish the sun would come out. It would be so lovely to have lunch outside with my friends. Maybe sometime this week.

Life is beautiful, enjoy every precious moment.

Closing Time

The school year comes to a close for me next Tuesday. After that, I will be a senior in college and that is quite honesty, extremely terrifying. I have one more year before I actually become and adult and have to do things that I won't have a clue about doing. Such as getting a real job??? Since when did this all happen? When did I grow up?

There are many more things to think about nowadays as I prepare for senior year and living in an on-campus apartment - the in-between step so that a real apartment is not so shocking. I have to figure out what I am going to bring, what my schedule from day to day will look like and what I will be doing outside of my classes. Next semester I have Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays off and I am still debating whether or not I should get an off-campus job. Just thinking about all these choices is making me go nutty.

All I know is that the Lord has a plan and that no matter what next year is going to amaze me and I am going to enjoy every moment. My life is slowing down and I am so grateful to finally have fewer things to cause anxiety. Since returning from Mississippi, I feel myself just deflating from all the pressure of the trip.

And in the past few weeks since starting this new relationship with Aaron, I have been thinking about what the next year and the summer will look like with him. What will this year bring for us in this exciting new adventure? We are already planning many fun dates for the summer and we look forward to cooking together in my apartment. We want to maintain a healthy relationship that truly brings joy to our lives and to our time together. I am excited to see what happens this summer and throughout our senior year and to see where life takes us. I really care about him and I am so thankful for him and the man he is. God has truly given me a gift that I will always cherish.

Lucky

I am so blessed because I have found a man with whom I can enjoy life. Though we are different, we are very similar and I do appreciate being with him. We both enjoy art in most any form and we are able to appreciate the many ways that we express ourselves through art. One activity that we enjoy together is coloring, which sounds childish, but it is entertaining and we always laugh while we do this. He is teaching me how to do glass blowing and I am teaching him more about photography. I have thoroughly enjoyed being with Aaron as I do not feel as though I have to change anything. He cares for me because of who I am, not who I could be or was in the past. Being with him is a relief because I am myself and both of us feel natural and real around one another. With him I am always honest and I am always able to tell him what I am thinking, no matter what it is.

This man is a gift and a treasure and I thank God for him everyday.

Time for Reflecting

This is a time of year when I usually reflect on the year and what it has meant for me. I am still processing all that has happened this year and all that I have learned through my experiences and relationships. Many things have been made clear to me and make more sense now as to why they happen, even though they are difficult. Everything has a purpose and whether or not that purpose is good or bad, you learn. And oh, have I learned.

Not only have I learned, but I have experienced this year. I have gone through much more than I thought I could endure, but I made it through and that empowers me. I can celebrate amongst chaos and confusion. Not everything looks beautiful when it first blooms, but eventually you wake up finding yourself amongst a garden of lovely flowers. It is only then that you see what has been growing around you. I have finally woken up and my garden is glorious.

My mind, body, and soul have become places where I feel safe and I know that I can run to them when I see something questionable on the horizon. I can see that this life is full of surprises and twists that you are blindsided by. And those are the moments when I can only throw my head back and laugh because life can seem so predictable until those instances sweep in and take the breath right out of your throat. This past month alone has captured my whole respiratory system as I revel is how beautiful surprises can be, and I have truly found a beautiful surprise.

As the school year closes, I will continue to reflect on what it means to be faithful and calm amongst the college stress of end of the year finals. But I have faith that all will be well and I will return home with a smile on my face and a newfound appreciation for my growth in maturity. I look forward to having a summer to reflect on how my own person has changed this year and just how I got to the place I am in now.

Always remember that life is beautiful. When it does not seem that way, close your eyes and know that when you open them again, you will be surrounded by a garden that was being cultivated all the while you struggled. There is beauty everywhere and there is hope in everything.